the fam

      I can't tell if discussing my family is fortuitous or not. The jury is still out. My dad's mom was Spanish and ruled with an iron first. With that came the old-school Hispanic tradition of being tight-knit. Charles (technically me dad) always emphasized how my and my siblings' sole job in this life was to watch out for one another. Some of us held up our end of the bargains. Others did not make this a priority.

      I've always made it a point to attend my family's holiday gatherings, graduations, weddings, funerals, birthdays, and every event in between. That shit has just not been reciprocated with me, which I take seriously. I have aunts and uncles who have emotionally and physically abused me throughout my childhood. I have some bio family that are not in alignment with my values— those who are career crackheads, lost custody of their kids due to their drug use, steal multiple people's identity & embezzle, or are in pure denial about their alcoholism or hurt they have caused. Then I have family members who had me sell their prescription pills or told me to lie to their spouse about escapades we went on or who blatantly criticize me with no qualms. But due to that ingrained moral that blood family is everything, I endured trauma for far too long from people who really haven't contributed to my successes or encouraged me or supported me when I was down and out. 

      It was just this year that it clicked... I can choose my family. I have full reign over who I allow into my circle. I can enforce boundaries and not feel bad about them. People who make me feel loved and seen and celebrated after our interactions; not depleted or stressed or angry. 

      My family includes my Mom, Joshua, Marcus, Kyli, Kassandra, Keith, Brian, Nina, Shalynn, and Mallori. My mains who I talk to weekly and who have helped me through the lowest lows and are always cheering me on during my ascension. These are people who I respect and love with my whole being and who I am proud of. This is my family. ♡

But also.... I did this a few years ago & still find it interesting.