About Relationships

     Even though I have 18 years of life experience on my resumé, when it comes to relationships, I'm a total n00b. I'm cute and have great qualities, but my parents divorced when I was a year old. I never had an example of how things should or shouldn't be. With that said, during my first fight with my first real boyfriend, I had some questions about what was going on. I turned to one of my best friends, RG, who was also my social studies teacher from 6th to 11th grade. I'll explain more at a later time. Right now, I needed advice from a dude who had dated the same chick since 1995. He's legit.

     So I texted him and asked, "What's the point of a relationship?"

     To which he replied, "Any relationship? Friendship? Or monogamously sexual?"
(monogamy, n. the practice of having only one mate... I didn't know, now you do.)

     "Dating... marriage..." The reply caused a huge smile to appear on my face. It's the small moments in life that make you appreciate it that much more

     "Dating is a test drive. Does this person possess enough positives to outweigh their negatives? Marriage goes against nature. In nature, mammals get with as many healthy partners as they can to propagate their own genetic line. But in polite society, marriage serves at least three functions.

1. 'This woman's children are all mine, so I know MY children will inherit MY stuff.'
2. Less violence in society because generally people accept that married people are unavailable.
3. Monogamy is a statement between two people that says, 'You mean so much to me, I'm perfectly happy to limit my gene pool and cease all sexual encounters with all others.'"

"I don't know what purpose my boyfriend serves. A friend you have sex with? Or am I actually supposed to trust him and tell him stuff about my life? Do I treat him like I do my brothers? Can I piss him off or do I keep walking on egg shells to constantly please him? This is more complicated than I envisioned..."

     "The sex should come after you're seriously considering a purchase (read marriage). Don't trust him with your secrets until you trust him with your heart, and he trusts you with his heart and secrets. Piss him off and test for reaction. Is he a bitch? How big of a bitch? There is too much, but there's also not enough. Be yourself if you're proud of who you are. If you're not proud of you, be better... while still not being someone you're not. Easy enough!?!"

     I didn't respond. What could I have said? He layed a lot on me. I needed time to ponder.